The idea is simple: Japanese women who want to meet foreign men, and vice versa, pay 2,000 yen ($18.19) admission, play a series of ice-breaking games to get in the mood, meet some new people and as the flier says, "Who knows, find a special relationship."

As usual at these events, the women outnumber the men by about 3 to 1; as if that wasn't tempting enough for the males, some events only charge an entrance fee to the women. Inside, everyone is handed a piece of string, grabs a drink, sits down and begins to eye everyone else a little uncertainly. The more bold and beautiful ones have immediately begun to make approaches, and by the time everyone has had a few drinks, the games start.

Pens and short questionnaires are handed out to the men. To discourage clichéd opening lines, help with the language barrier and put everyone on the same footing, questions are written in English and Japanese. The men are given five minutes at each table to find out names and hobbies, make contact with as many people as possible and maybe get a phone number.

Thirty minutes into the game, most are chatting away furiously, though Hisako Ikeda, 28, is sitting alone. "I didn't really want to come, but my friend said she would be lonely without me." She looks over at her friend dancing with a handsome young foreigner and idly twirls her piece of string. "Plus I thought it would be a good chance to practice my English."

David, 24, from Michigan, has a clear objective. "The girls obviously want to meet foreign guys -- so here I am. The only trouble is choosing which one. Who do you think is best?" He shows me several Polaroids of himself with a succession of pretty young women. "This is so cool, I could never get this many girls back home."

Despite David and Mark's level of success, finding a suitable partner in Japan, especially for marriage, has never been easy. In a country where people readily acknowledge their shyness, particularly outside their immediate group, help has often been sought.

Omiai kekkon -- arranged marriages -- have been common practice in Japan for centuries. Considered more a merging of households than individuals, they were popular among the samurai class as a way to cement alliances. This type of marriage then spread to the lower orders from the 17th century, and in prewar Japan, the majority of all marriages were omiai kekkon.

A nakodo, or go-between, is appointed to find someone a suitable partner, paying particular attention to family, educational background, common interests and, of course, the man's income. Tsurisho -- personal histories -- and photographs are exchanged, and if everyone likes what they see, the nakodo then arranges an omiai -- literally a "see-meet" -- usually at a hotel or restaurant. The nakodo guides conversation so that both parties, often including the parents, make a favorable impression on the other. The couple will be left alone for a while, and if all goes well, can begin dating. Polite refusals are made through the nakodo, who tactfully expresses regret to avoid loss of face to either party.

Though the average age at marriage has risen from 25.9 years for men and 23 years for women in 1950 to 28.5 and 26.3 in 1996, people of a marriageable age -- women especially -- often find themselves pressured by parents or employers to try omiai. Others try it just for fun, though the reality is often far different. Today omiai make up only 10 percent of Japanese marriages, and many who use the system may lack the social skills necessary to find dates of their own.

Naoko Murayama, 27, has been on several omiai and has found them all hard work. "The men are all really serious, it's almost impossible to get any conversation out of them. The last guy I met was so boring I was desperate to go home, but after dinner he asked me to go for a drive. He was a friend's cousin so I couldn't refuse. Normally you'd go and look at an interesting night view, but he just drove me 'round the city for a while without saying a word."

Yuko Matsuoka, 38, had an arranged marriage when she was 24. After having been in an affair with a married colleague for one and a half years, she'd tired of the secrecy and told her lover of her intention to approach a nakodo. He agreed it was a good idea and asked their boss to fill the role.

A meeting was set up with a suitable, rich gentleman. She met with him, had tea and cakes, exchanged small talk and went for a drive. Both decided they would meet again. Matsuoka thought he was gentle and had nice, white teeth, "But he was not sexy. We dated for three weeks but it wasn't interesting, there was no color to him. I didn't want to see him again, but the nakodo asked me to meet him once more and he proposed during a seaside walk."

"I told my parents and they pushed me to marry him. I said I wasn't interested, but my mother cried and said if I didn't dislike him, I should marry him. I didn't love him, but I accepted. My parents wanted my life to be sorted out and I wanted a baby -- more than I wanted a husband. The marriage was not for me, but for my parents."

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